Casting Call: WEtv

Hi DIYers,

WEtv and Ish Entertainment is casting Los Angeles-area couples for a new series that gives couples a chance for a wedding day DO OVER. Neat! The details:

WEtv and Ish Entertainment is casting Los Angeles-area couples who experienced wedding mishaps that put a huge damper on their big day.  This exciting new series will give these deserving couples the opportunity to get the ultimate DO OVER…a dream wedding celebration planned by acclaimed celebrity wedding designer, Diann Valentine.

Did you - or anyone you know – suffer a wedding hiccup on the big day?  We’re looking for deserving couples who battled anything from weather related issues (power outages, rain on outdoor weddings), family drama (bad wedding toasts, family arguments on the big day) or even comical bloopers (bridal party members falling into the lake during photos) that kept them from enjoying the wedding day they always dreamed of!

Couples must be in and around the LA area.

Contact: IshTVCasting.Julia@gmail.com / www.ishtvcasting.com



DIY Planning: Oh No! Wedding Funding Cut

Dear DIY Bride: My dad and step-mom had offered to pay for our March 2011 reception expenses. Long story short – because Dad is getting divorced the amount of funds available to us is significantly (like less than half!) less than it was 6 months ago. We’ve signed contracts for all of our reception vendors. What do we do?  – Anon

Dear Anon, I’m sorry you’re faced with such a stressful situation so close to your wedding. Dealing with finances and a breakup within your family must be difficult. My heart is with you! A cut in wedding funding after you’ve signed contracts is a serious situation. A contract is a legally binding document. You are, by law, required to pay the amount you agreed to when you signed the contract – even if you don’t have the money. Here’s my recommended plan of action: 1. Assess your current financial situation. How much money do you reallyhave to devote to your wedding? Is the money in your bank account or are the funds being paid by your dad? The more money in your control (in your  bank account or credit line) the better especially if your dad’s funds could be restricted during the divorce proceedings. 2. Start looking over your contracts ASAP. Your vendors may have some built-in flexibility in the terms of the contract. With a severe cut in funding you’re going to have to make some changes. Many reception-related vendors will allow changes, including cancellation, only up to a certain date. Some contract changes may incur a fee. Some contracts may not offer any kind of flexibility. Before you start contacting your vendors, know the terms of your contracts. 3. I know this is really, really hard but you need to start looking at what can be altered in your wedding so that you can work within your new financial reality. The big 3 money savers: reduce the guest list, cut back on alcohol, nix the favors.

  • Let’s throw out some numbers to help you visualize the savings. Most venues will sit 8 people to a round table so let’s cut 1 table’s worth of guests from  your list. Let’s say your per guest catering fee is $45. Removing 8 people from your reception will save you: $360 in catering alone. Minus the rental of 1 round table and 8 chairs ($5/chivari chair and $11/table) and you’ll save another $51.00. Table linens? Let’s say $20. Dishes, glasses? $5/pp. Centerpiece? We’ll go cheap and say $50. Wine, alcohol, and soda? $10 per person is a safe number. Cutting 1 table of 8 people can save you over $600.

4. The next step is to contact your vendors and let them know what your situation is. In the best of circumstances, the vendors will be willing – and able – to negotiate a new contract with you to fit your new budget. This is where the work in steps 1 – 3 come into play; you’ll need to make some concessions like a smaller guest list, different menu options, cheaper linens, wine or beer, etc. for a negotiation to work. Knowing exactly how much money you have to work with, how small of a guest list you can get by with, and what extras you can downsize or change is absolutely essential. Do note that vendors are in no way obligated to negotiate with you. Your best bet for success is to approach them with kindness, humility, and honesty. (Not that you wouldn’t, dear Anon, I’m sure you’re a class act.) Many will be sympathetic to your situation and will be willing to work with you on creating a new contract if you give them enough time and incentive to do so. Since you’re 3 months out, that’s adequate time for them to make adjustments. What changes can often be negotiated? Catering: The food, of course. Cheaper cuts of meat, switching from fish to a vegetarian dish, serving seasonal dishes/ingredients are ways to save. Rentals: Downgrade linen rentals, switch from chiavari or specialty chairs to standard banquet chairs, skip chair covers or table runners. Use basic dishes and glassware. Floral: Skip any venue decor and go for centerpieces only (this is what the guests will notice most anyway), skip the bouquet toss, don’t decorate buffet or cake tables – let the food serve as the decor. Use seasonal flowers. DJ/Musicians: There’s not a lot of room for negotiation here beyond the number of hours contracted. Photography/Videography: Again, the number of hours contracted is the #1 way to save money unless you’re locked into a package deal. Go for a less expensive photography package or ask for a la carte options. Venue: Venue fees aren’t generally negotiable. You may be able to wrangle a better deal by switching from a Saturday to a Sunday or Friday-evening wedding. Good luck and best wishes to you! DIYers, do you have suggestions for Anon? Let us know!



Rachel + Alex

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What happens when a DJ and a DIYer get married? Magic happens, people. Magic! This super fun couple, Alex and Rachel, put together a sweet, romantic day with touches of vintage. I love the mix of casual and elegant, vintage and contemporary, traditional and whimsical. Gorgeous!

Couple: Rachel  + Alex

Wedding Date: 06/2010

Location: San Diego, California

Photographer: Anika London

Reception: The Admiral Kidd Club

Makeup Artist: Rita Nguyen

Additional information about this wedding from the photographer: The groom is a DJ and the bride is a BIG do-it-yourself’er… they’re both in love with music and vintage style. The bride also has a blog that follows her on her do-it-yourself adventures including planning her wedding, designing their home and exciting vintage fashion finds. They wanted a sweet, vintage, romantic feel, fueled by the energy of their favorite music!





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Steph + Isaiah

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Weddings by the water are somehow inherently romantic. While most have beach or by-the-ocean affairs, we’re beginning to see a bit of an uptick in the number of lakeside weddings. I love this! Lakes are an underutilized venue option. I hope this wedding, that of Isaiah and Steph inspires you to explore your local lakes. Isn’t this just so romantic, inviting, and warm?

Details:

Couple: Steph & Isaiah

Wedding Date: 06/2010

Country: United States

Photographer: Ampersand Photography

Reception Venue: Smith Mountain Lake – home

Cake Designer: Robert Clarkin cakes

Additional information about this wedding from the photographer: Isaiah & Steph did most of the wedding planning, decorating, and everything else all on their own (and with the help of tons of loving family and friends). The wedding was held in the backyard of a family friend (they have a gazebo right on the lake). Steph’s mom, sister, and aunts did the flowers, and friends helped her coordinate everything. The morning of the wedding all of Steph’s bridesmaids were out by the lake setting everything up and decorating. Isaiah & Steph have friends that own a bluegrass band, and they did the music during the ceremony and the reception. One friend made the cake, another friend made barbecue for the reception meal, and still another friend did her make-up. Isaiah searched for weeks to find the perfect ring for her, and finally settled on a 1920′s antique ring, which is absolutely perfect for her.





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Lauren + Trevor

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A great wedding doesn’t have to be a huge, blow-out event. It can be a small, intimate gathering on a beach followed by dinner at your favorite restaurant like Lauren and Trevor’s August ’09 wedding. Scaling down doesn’t mean sacrificing fun or meaning or style. Take a peek at how it’s done.

Details:

Couple: Lauren + Trevor

Wedding Date: 08/2009

Location: Jacksonville, Florida

Photographer: Thomas Lester Photography

Reception Venue: Maggiano’s Little Italy Jacksonville

Floral Designer: Kuhn Flowers

Photographer’s notes about the wedding: Laruen, the bride, organized everything. The only two vendors was the reception vendor (who provided the catering, bar, and cake) and the florist. Lauren collected sea shells for weeks to create an aisle and altar area. She also lined the altar with twigs she purchased. Lauren’s mom made ornamental balls for the bridesmaids to wear.





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Southern Weddings Magazine

I am honored to be featured in Southern Weddings magazine as part of their roundup of must read wedding blogs. (DIYBride is listed on page 79.) Southern Weddings is, hands down, one of my all-time favorite magazines (not just in the wedding category) so this is a real thrill for me.

Southern Weddings has an irresistible mix of elements – beautiful photography, real weddings, sage advice, fab articles and creative ideas – all packaged with high style and delightful southern charm.

Do check out their blog or buy a copy of SW issue #3 before it sells out!




Danika + Ben

Photographer Jennifer Brindleykindly shared this gorgeous DIY wedding of Danika and Ben. About the big day:

A bony and graceful white bird perched on the shore of Lake Michigan, the Milwaukee Art Museum designed by Spanish architect Santiago Calatrava was the perfect canvas for Ben and Danika to add their own DIY artistic touches to their wedding day. It had long been Ben’s dream to grow his own wedding flowers, he just had to meet the girl! When wedding planning commenced Ben and his mother-in-law began planting marigolds and zinnias from seed, two hearty and colorful varieties of flower that would reach their peak for the mid-July wedding. These flowers were arranged by Ben and Danika’s moms, who added lush hosta leaves as greenery. Lucky guests took home the vases, also handmade by the couple. The ceramic vases were formed by pressing slabs of clay into cylindrical molds lined with wet paper towels to create a fractured, organic surface on the finished vase. The vases were stamped with the couple’s wedding date and glazed a milky white.

Letters by post were important in the couple’s courtship, so table favors consisted of colorful blank stationery adorned with fully-mailable, uncanceled vintage postage stamps the couple found on E-bay. Guests were encouraged to send this unique snail mail to friends or loved ones of their choice.

Details: Photographer: Jennifer Brindley of JBe Photography Couple: Ben and Danika Brubaker Date: July 16th, 2010 Location: Milwaukee Art Museum, Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Creative elements:  This wedding was creative and unique in so many ways!  Danika wore the necklace given to her by Ben’s grandmother.  She told her that she’d been saving it her whole life for the right woman for Ben at their wedding, and that she knew it was going to the right woman.  They had a close friend play the guitar for their processional and also a special song during the wedding.  Their wedding colors were a vibrant orange, yellow and green to play off of the beauty of spring time, the clean white of the art museum, and the special flowers grown for the wedding. DIY projects:  It had always been Ben’s dream to grow the flowers for his wedding.  What a unique thing for a groom to say!  So, Ben and Danika’s mother grew all the flowers for this wedding.  They made the clay vases with Danika, and Ben’s mother arranged all the flowers, as well as made the boutonnières.  They also had a very unique “favor.”  They had been collecting vintage stamps, and made up an orange envelope for every guest with enough vintage stamps to mail a letter.  They said the guests could use it to mail a letter to anyone, but they hoped they’d get letters from their guests.  I thought this was a really creative alternative to a guest book! I also loved that Danika was a pregnant bride.  They were adamant about having the wedding while she was pregnant, and featuring/showcasing her belly because it was a family event.  They were happy and proud to have their unborn baby at the wedding. They did not opt to hire a DJ, but instead had a friend run an iPod.  They created a very special mix of music that reflected their deep love for each other and the love for their friends and family.





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Julie + Chad

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I adore this intimate wedding from photographer Jennifer Bowen. Jennifer writes about Julie and Chad’s wedding:

Julie and Chad’s wedding was whimsical, avant garde and vintage inspired. The bride coordinated the event herself, including most of the details. The flowers were feather adorned and her gown very vintage & romantic. Their ceremony took place outdoors at a Paradise Valley, AZ resort (Montelucia) and was lit completely by candlelight. Their cocktail reception was “station” inspired, so that there was a cigar bar, wine bar, gelatto bar, fondue station and more… and was also light mainly by candlelight. They had a photo booth, live dueling pianists and lots of candles. The bride organized an entry way table to greet guests that was lined with tall vases of over-flowing moss like creations, silver frames, candles and several other silver vintage centerpieces. This small storyboard does not do the full event justice, but it was a very one of a kind affair!

 Details: Couple: Julie + Chad Wedding Date: March 2010 Location: Paradise Valley,Arizona Photographer: Jennifer Bowen Photography Reception Venue: Hotel InterContinental Montelucia Resort





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Real Etiquette: Unwanted DIY Projects

This is an interesting contrast to our last R.E. post that dealt with getting people to help with DIY projects.

Dear DIY Bride: My fiance’s aunt is insisting that she make my bridal bouquet. She’s well-known in our family for making silk arrangements. They’re nice but not even close to what I want. How do you suggest dealing with unwanted projects that are being pushed upon you? (Please don’t suggest having her do a toss bouquet; we’re not doing a bouquet toss! Thanks!) — Kayleigh

Dear Kayleigh,

Have you flat out told her “no, thank you” yet? It is my experience that being direct – but gentle – is often the best approach for dealing with helpy helpertons. “Thanks, Auntie, but I’ve already decided on using fresh flowers for my bouquet.” should be sufficient. If pressed for more details be honest but vague. “Fresh flowers are intensely meaningful to me.” “We’ve already found our perfect florist and signed a contract.” Don’t give room for negotiation with statements like “Silk flowers aren’t as pretty as real ones…” Stay firm but be polite as possible. If she ultimately leaves angry, that’s on her – not you or your fiance.

It’s actually lovely that she wants to contribute and in a way that’s meaningful to her. It is your wedding, however, and you get to make the decisions about what you carry down the aisle. In the grand scheme of things this shouldn’t be a big deal but we all know how family politics in a wedding setting can go haywire.

If you’re not totally against the idea of her helping out, I do recommend giving her alternative projects or ways to chip in. How about corsages for the moms and grandmothers? Decorating the guest book or gift tables?  The altar? Guest chairs? Adding flowers to the guest book pen or the cake knife? Decorating the getaway car? Or a faux bouquet for the rehearsal?  There are a multitude of floral projects that can successfully be done with silks without distracting from the fresh florals that you love.



Real Etiquette: Mandatory DIY?

Dear DIY Bride: My fiance and I have a ton of DIY projects on our list to help save money. If it weren’t for DIY, we wouldn’t be able to have a wedding at all. Our problem is that we’ve asked our bridal party to chip in to help us make some projects. They’re all flaking! We can’t do this without help but our helpers are nowhere to be found on project day. Should we tell them they’ve got to help or they won’t be in the wedding? Neither of us likes threats but …

Our Response: Giving your friends and family an ultimatum to help or be excluded from the wedding party is a sure way to alienate them.

You don’t mention how – or even if – your wedding party was asked to participate in creating things for your wedding. Was it a condition they agreed to when you asked them to be in your wedding party? Were their “duties” clearly stated or did you assume they’d all want – and be able – to chip in?

I understand your predicament with needing to save money, wanting to DIY, and not having the support to do it. An ultimatum likely won’t yield the results you seek so let’s brainstorm better solutions.

1. Make a list of each project on your  list and outline each step that needs to be done to complete it. Give a “must complete by” date for each task. Knowing what you need to accomplish and when will help you organize and prioritize.

2. Decide which projects are most important or critical for you and your fiance. Tackle these first.

3. Start contacting your wedding party, your friends, and family and ask all of them if they’d be willing and able to help you achieve your goals. Saying something like “Hey, everyone! Our wedding is xxx days away and we’re needing some helping hands to make it happen. We have x projects to complete for the big day and would appreciate your assistance if you can spare the time. No crafting experience necessary. We’re proving cocktails/BBQ/snacks for our helpers on xx day at our house…”  Keep it fun, non-threatening, and in the spirit of sharing in the excitement of the big day.

4. For those that offer their help, show them the list and see what they’re most interested in doing. Schedule a time when they can help if they can’t make it to a “craft day”.

If no one offers help, then you’ll need to scale back your plans or look for alternative help (ask on wedding forums!). Remember: everyone is busy and over-extended these days.  Taking time away from school, work, family life, social engagements and their normal “down time” can be quite difficult for your loved ones. It doesn’t mean they don’t love you and want  you to have a kick-ass wedding. It means that their life has priority over your crafty ambitions  and that’s perfectly ok.  It’s your job to scale your wedding to your abilities and budget – there’s no shame in that.



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