May 20 2009
{Guest Post} K Sherrie+Company Introduces Paper Basics, Pt. 3
Photo Credit: White Aisle
The Pleasure of Your Company Is Requested
Don’t spend a lot of time thinking about the proper way to address a female friend with a live-in lover. There are many online resources that will tell you what the proper etiquette is when it comes to wedding stationery. One very popular one is the Crane’s Wedding Blue Book. And proper etiquette is of utmost importance. Keep reading for some guidelines that even Emily Post will be impressed by.
Firstly, invitation ensembles should be mailed out six to eight weeks before your wedding. If you are having a destination wedding or many of your guests are traveling from afar, I would suggest that your invites be sent eight weeks prior.
It’s a personal decision, but most traditional invitations consist of an inner envelope and an outer envelope. Make the green, eco-chic choice of leaving out the inner envelope. If you decide to go with the two envelopes, the outer envelope is addressed and stamped while the inner envelope only has the names of those who are invited to the wedding. Also a guest management tool, the inner envelope allows you to be very specific as to who is invited to your nuptials. This is an awesome way to communicate to your invitees whether they are allowed to bring a guest of not. When a guest is invited but his or her name is unknown, it is proper etiquette to only address the outer envelope to your friend “Miss Wilkerson” and address the inner envelope to your friend and her guest “Miss Wilkerson and Guest”. If the inner envelope is addressed to only “Miss Wilkerson,” this clearly means that she may not bring a guest. It is not inappropriate to address your friends and family in informal or familial terms on the inner envelope. This adds whimsy and a personal touch.
Photo Credit: Armato Design
Some other fine points to remember:
Do not use initials or abbreviations even with professional titles. Spell out first and last names, street names, apartment, place, court, avenue, number and states. Do not use an ampersand (&) in place of the word and. Mr. & Mrs. Wright is a no-no. Titles such as Doctor should be spelled out. Mr., Mrs. and Jr. is acceptable. Please be sure to obtain the correct title for clergy or military guests. Professional designations such as Esq., MD, PhD, etc. are not appropriate for wedding stationery. Sr., Jr. or III designations only appear on the outer envelope after the man’s last name. Do not write these on the inner envelope.
Children older than 18 should receive their own invitation, even if they are still living at home with the parents.
When addressing a married couple, you should always address both members of the married couple. For an unmarried couple living together, the etiquette is to address each party individually, with each name appearing on a separately line. For example: “Ms. Lisa Ferrell and Mr. Kenneth Sanders.”
All house numbers are written in numeric form except for “one,” which is spelled out. Apartment, suite and zip codes are also written in numeric form. Please only use home addressed for mailing wedding invitations.
Return addresses should be printed on the back flap of the envelope and be centered and in the same color ink that you are using for the wedding invitation. Name or names are excluded from the return address.
For a complimentary, complete guide to How to Address Wedding Stationery, send a quick email to info{at}ksherrieandcompany{dot}com and I will happily deliver it to your inbox. Whatever I can do to make your wedding tasks easier. . .
Katasha Butler is the owner of K Sherrie+Company Planning Atelier in Indianapolis. She blogs regularly at The Wedding Workroom.
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- {Guest Post} K Sherrie+Company Introduces Paper Basics
- {Guest Post} K Sherrie+Company Introduces Paper Basics, Pt. 2
- {Guest Post}: Ms. Polka Introduces Cristina Re
- {Guest Post}: Save the Date or Save the Money?
- {Guest Post} Jocelyn Shares Her Save The Dates
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WTH? I wrote out all my invitations, non-calligraphy, in my nicest handwriting, abbreviated state names, used apersands, etc. Does that make them a horrible breach of etiquette? Whatever.
But then again, our invitations weren’t intended for the trash can, but to be buried in the backyard so that the flower seeds embedded in the paper would grow wildflowers!
I’m pretty sure the etiquette goon squad will come to beat down your door for such infractions. Careful: they’re surly.